"What would you want to be different?"
Starting the therapeutic process by asking this question gives us an intention for our relationship. We begin with the understanding that the process is going to be led by her, not me. I'm not like parents or teachers whose job it is to give advice. I intervene as a trusted partner to facilitate changes and reach goals that she determines.
"I'm going to teach you how to think about your thinking."
I believe that listening to a girl's story promotes healing and I also believe she needs to learn skills to manage her life. How she thinks about herself, how she thinks about the world and how she thinks the world thinks about her is key to self understanding. Once a girl realizes how her thinking impacts her feelings and behavior, she can make changes to create more positive outcomes.